Black and White and Technicolor
by sol invictus
Summary: Up late watching horror movies with his brother, Cody has a heck of a time getting to sleep that night.


Cody was wrapped in his blankets, leaning forward, with only his face sticking out as the movie went on. He was long past the fear of peeing himself out of fright and was entering the realm of abject terror now. The zombie on the screen ambled up behind another unsuspecting victim and it was all Cody could do to not yell out a warning. As the monster sunk its rotten teeth into the poor woman he shut his eyes. When the movie went to a commercial break, Cody ducked his entire head into the blankets and curled into the fetal position.

"You're such a wuss," Zack said as he gently pushed Cody in the side.

"Why do I always let you talk me into watching these stupid movies?" Cody said in a muffled voice.

"Because you know if you don't watch them I'll make fun of you."

"And yet you do it even when I do watch them with you," Cody said as he peeked his face out of the blankets.

"Well, dur! The faces you make are _great_!"

"I think I hate you sometimes, Zack," Cody said as he sat back up and leaned against the back of the couch.

"I know, bro, I know. Now hush! It's back on."

Just under an hour later the movie was over and the boys shut everything off and headed to bed, knowing they had just enough time to either get to sleep or make a good show of it before their mother came home from her performance. Pajamas were donned and teeth were brushed and beds turned down in minutes.

Zack climbed into his bed and was almost instantly asleep. Cody watched with fright-filled eyes as his brother's movements slowly dwindled down to nothing and the rhythmic sounds of deep breathing filled his ears. He was still clutching the blankets with white knuckles a few minutes later when he heard the front door open and close.

Cody ducked down and played possum as Carey stuck her head in their door to check on them. Satisfied that both her boys were at least in bed she left the door slightly ajar and went to get herself ready for slumber. A good twenty minutes passed after all other sounds had ceased and Cody was still wide awake. He looked over at Zack and envied his ability to not be bothered by zombies and ghouls and ghosts and vampires and--

"That's it," he said softly. Cody rolled his legs out from beneath the covers and grabbed a handful of blankets and pillows. He tip-toed out the bedroom door and back to the couch, having decided that if he wasn't going to be able to sleep he'd at least watch some television. Not monster movies, of course, but kinder, gentler shows. Preferably ones with lots of smiles and happy families. He listened for any other sound in the suite and then flicked the set back on, losing himself in shows that were at least as old as his mother.

_Murphy Brown_ had come and gone, as had _Wings_, before Cody was relaxed enough to consider sleeping sometime this week. _Leave It To Beaver_ was just going off when Cody felt his eyes begin to get heavy. He made a valiant attempt to stay awake long enough to get back to his bed but didn't make it. He began to lightly doze just as the beginning of _Roseanne_ came across the screen...

The theme music was just dying down when Cody walked into the kitchen. He'd come from their back bedroom and still looked a bit disheveled. His wife Max was washing up the remains of the previous night's dishes in the sink while her sister, Carey, was drying. "Good morning, Maxie," he said to her as he kissed her softly on the cheek. "Mornin', Carey," he said, making as if he was going to slap her one. She returned the favor, acting as if she'd give him one right back.

"Mornin', Cody," Max said back to him as he walked over to the refrigerator. "I'm going to make breakfast soon so don't stuff yourself." Cody grunted and pulled a carafe of orange juice from one of the shelves. Max passed him a glass and he sat down in one of the large wooden chairs that surrounded the table.

Cody heard a thunderous stomping from the living room and leaned back in his chair just far enough to see his daughter Maddie come down the stairs. As she got closer Cody noticed that she was carrying clothes in one hand, a towel draped over her shoulder, and a rather irritated look on her face. She was about to turn the corner and head back to their bathroom, it seemed.

"Something wrong with your bathroom?" Cody asked as he picked up his glass.

"Oh, I think it's still working fine but I'm really not sure."

"Why's that, Maddie?" Max asked as she dried her hands off on a towel.

"Oh, I don't know, Mom...just maybe because I can't get in to be certain since Zack has locked himself in there again."

"Again?" Max asked, continuing to dry her hands, this time by nervous habit.

"This is the third time today," Maddie told her. "That I know of anyway."

It's barely eleven o'clock," Max said, checking the clock over the sink. "Is he sick? Maybe I should go up and check on him." Max tossed the towel on the counter and walked over by the table. Carey grinned as she opened the 'fridge to pour herself some tea.

"I don't think he's sick, Max," Carey said as she closed the door.

"What do you mean, Carey?" Max turned to her sister.

"Well, Max, just think about it for a minute. How old is Zack now?"

"He's thirteen, Carey."

"Right. C'mon, Max...think about it. Cody? What'd you do behind closed doors when you were thirteen?" Cody blushed.

"I don't even want to think about what he's doing up there," Cody said as he looked down to the table and put his head in his hands. The studio audience broke out into a fit of laughter.

"Oh for crying out loud," Maddie said as she threw her hands up in the air, "he's up there masturbating. There! I said it!"

"He is _not_," Max said with disbelief, "maybe he's just up there repeatedly brushing his teeth or something equally compulsive."

"Denial, Max, isn't just a river in Egypt," Carey managed to get out, barely being able to swallow her tea without laughing.

"I don't think I'm having this conversation anymore," Cody said as he started to get up from the table.

"Maybe you should, you know, go have a talk with him, Cody," Max told him as she walked up behind him.

"Yeah, Dad, he's in there for at least an hour at a time, so to me that means that he's either really really good at it--"

"Don't say it, Maddie," Cody said with a hand over his eyes.

"-- Or really really bad at it." Cody could only shake his head.

"I think that if anyone needs me I'm going to be out in the garage...doing...something with tools," Cody said as he made his way out through the laundry room to the garage. The studio audience erupted into near-hysterics as the real Cody slowly regained a slight amount of consciousness...

He rolled over onto his back and looked through sleepy eyes at the television. _Roseanne_. Nice. He promised himself that he'd get up and go back to bed after he felt his eyes getting heavy again. He'd just rest them for a few moments and then go, he told himself as he fell asleep again just after _I Love Lucy_ came on...

Cody Martino looked around and saw that everything was in black and white. He also noticed that he was quite the savvy dresser. _Odd_, he thought but that was as far as he could get with that thought before a shrill, nasal whine split his ears.

"Coooooooody!" A very redheaded London said to him as he walked through the door. "I want to be in the show tonight!" London pounded her fists against her legs.

"London," Cody said with a surprising Cuban accent, "I haf tol' you a thou-san times you canna' pear-form in the club."

"But why not, Cody?" London whined again

"Because, London, you canna' sing or canna' dance. What you gonna do on stage? Break things?"

"I've been practicing, Cody!"

"For the thou-san and one times, no! Now go get ready. The Murtzes will be here soon." London sulked off into the bedroom to a smattering of snickers from the audience. Seconds after London closed the bedroom door the front door's buzzer rang

"Come on in," Cody Martino said as he relaxed on the couch. Zack and Maddie Murtz walked in and joined Cody on the couch.

"London's not ready yet, huh Cody?"

"No, Zack. She's taking her sweet time about it. I tol' her she wasn't going to be in the show again." Zack gave him a commiserating look.

"Here, you boys stay put and I'll go help her get ready," Maddie Murtz said as she headed toward the bedroom door. Cody and Zack started discussing the Mets and the Yankees as the camera's attention panned over into the Martino's bedroom.

"Hello, London," Maddie said as she closed the door behind her. London returned the greeting but didn't move from her bed. "What's the matter, London?"

"Ricky won't let me be in the show again, Maddie. And I've been practicing all month." London got off the bed. "See? Watch." She started dancing around, twirling her arms and generally looking rather decent until she caught her toe on the corner of a nightstand and went down in a heap.

"Well, London..." Maddie stammered, "I can see you've been practicing. Your landings." The audience roared as London picked herself up off the floor.

"I've just got to get in, Maddie."

"But Cody's already told you no, London. Countless times."

"True, but I have a plan!" A very devious smile crossed London's face. Maddie leaned in conspiratorially. "Cody Martino won't know I'm even on the stage!"

"What's your plan, London?" They whispered back and forth as the audience applauded and the real Cody drifted further into sleep's deep embrace, leaving all traces of the Martinos and their black and white New York City apartment behind...

A short while later Cody coughed in his sleep and woke himself up. He rubbed his eyes and saw the end credits rolling for _I Love Lucy_. He yawned and sat up straight just as the television softly announced that _Golden Girls_ was coming up next.

"I think," Cody said as he stretched his entire body for a five-count and yawned, "that I'd better get to bed." He didn't finish the thought that there were no male roles on _Golden Girls_ for him to play. Cody thumbed the button on the remote to turn the television off and he gathered up his blankets, Blankie included, and his pillow and made his way back to the bedroom.

He looked over at Zack and snickered. "You're either really, really good at it, Zack," he said softly giggled, "or you're really really bad at it!" With that he buried himself in the blankets and was asleep in minutes, not bothered by dreams of any sort.

fin

sol's notes:

I hope that you all got the old tv references. I am a very lucid dreamer and if I happen to fall asleep in front of the television I'll end up dreaming about what's going on, no matter what the show is about.

Just in case you don't have the love for older tv shows like I do, I'll give a list of characters and who they were played by in Cody's dreams...

_Roseanne_-- Cody was Dan Connor, Max was Roseanne Connor (Cody's wife), Carey was Jackie SomethingOrOther, Roseanne's sister, Maddie was Darlene, the Connor's middle child, and Zack was implied to be DJ, the younger boy child. This bit was from my all-time favorite Roseanne episode, one that I can still almost see play in my head now.

_I Love Lucy_ – Cody Martino was Ricky Ricardo, London was Lucy Ricardo, and Zack and Maddie were Fred and Ethel Murtz, the Ricardo's upstairs neighbors and friends.

What'd you guys think? I like writing different things and, well, I think this is sort of a first for TSL.

(and don't worry, Ductworks is being worked on as well...this just screamed a bit louder)


End file.
